I'm really lost. I don't know what more to give anyone. Robert doesn't want me, I don't know how I deluded myself into thinking he would, it's done between us, he cares not at all about me. Daryl doesn't like me, I irritate the hell out of him, I don't even have any idea why he sticks around. Clayton wants to disown me. I have no friends. I could say it's because I'm fat and ugly but really it's because my personality is so insignificant, so unsatisfying that no one cares enough to stick around. Losing weight will only help me look good on the outside, but there's nothing that's going to help me inside. I'm an idiot and a jerk. I can't wait to get out of this place... Ever since I moved here I've felt lost... Well, actually ever since I turned 13 I felt lost... I just need to get over it! I'm not special! I'll never be special!! I'll never be what Robert needs or what Daryl wants. I'll never be perfect in my own eyes, I'll never have a good body. But at least I can try, at least I can work, at least I have music, that's all I need. Music is all I'll ever need.
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